Origins

I have always wondered, why we as humans are so curious about the origins of others of our own species. Why casual conversations more often than not include the question, “Where are you from?”

In the increasingly mobile world of today, this question is becoming somewhat dated. It matters not where you come from; it matters what you do, how many you influence and what you make of yourself. I am of Indian origin, have American citizenship, but I reside in Germany.

My philosophy is simple, I go where the opportunity is, and where I believe my husband and I can build a good foundation for our daughter and her future.

In India, the question of origins goes even further than the casual “where are you from?” to what your family name is and how many generations of your family have lived in your place of origin. Then comes the inherent determination of religion, caste, etc. and where you could be placed on the socio-economic totem pole. It is mind-boggling to me why we would do this to ourselves. Judgment in this form is neither fair nor practical because those same people that seem unimportant may one day become important and could prove to be allies.

Diversity of population is becoming the norm in almost all western countries. Europe is a potpourri of cultures since several generations of people from the Middle East and Africa have come and settled in Western Europe. America has heightened security measures since 9/11 but continues to promote diversity nevertheless. It is still the most sought after destination for higher education in the world.

The world is simultaneously too large and too small. Connections are what make it small, and what goes around eventually comes around. You don’t have to agree or even get along with everyone, but never make the mistake of silent judgment based on origin and everything associated.

I grew up in an environment where diversity was welcome. My father traveled often for business to Russia, Europe and also South East Asia and we also had his clients and friends come over to our house. Although my mother got thoroughly fed up of entertaining my father’s guests after a while, my brother and I enjoyed it a lot. We experienced things through that our classmates and neighbors could only dream of. I always felt guilty when I awaited my dad’s arrival after 2-3 weeks, only because of the promise of some exotic chocolate, cheese or other gifts. But that is the way with children, I suppose. Those gifts used to comprise half his luggage.  These items are all available in India now, but 25 years ago they were a novelty.

After I graduated from engineering school, I had a job offer in India. However, I turned it down to pursue a Master’s degree in America. I visited my uncle in Chicago when I was 17, and I knew then, that as soon as I could, I had to return. Of course, at the time I didn’t know that I would end up in wintry Buffalo, NY and spend 8 years there. The silver lining was that I met my now-husband there, and started a family. He is an American, that too from Oklahoma. But accepting his family, and their acceptance of me just came naturally. I do not know if my parents have fully accepted him yet, because we do not talk openly about such things, but they have taken everything in stride and respected my decision. I am very grateful to them for having given me the freedom to choose my path in life. It has not been easy, and I still struggle to ‘fit in’ as society demands it. It is nevertheless, a path of my choosing.

I will certainly never forget where I come from, but that does not stop me from inviting influences into my world, that will shape the future for myself and my family.

By

Yashaswini Patwardhan

Karlsruhe, Germany